Stockholm Syndrome
by Neko Kate-chan
Summary: MurakiTsuzuki GIFT FIC FOR JollyOlly Muraki kidnaps Tsuzuki... But how can Tsuzuki love someone who is so easy to hate?
1. Chapter 1

**To:** "Jollyolly"

**From**: "Neko Kate-Chan"

**Requirements**: MurakixTsuzuki, Four Part, Lemon, Sap

**Author's Touches**: TsuzukixHisoka, MurakixSaki (See my Mursaki fic 'Sins of the Devil'), MurakixOriya, TatsumixTsuzuki, angst, humor, EVANGELION SPOILERS

**Author's Notes**: The first part of this is out now. The next three chapters will get done when they get done. Due to demand I'm working my fingers to the bone with request fics so please be patient. Thank you. Also, I wish to point out that though this fic has a universal 'T' rating, this is only for the first chapter, because I wanted it to appear on the main listing. Therefore, I ask you to read with caution. I will be changing the rating when I post up the second chapter and have attracted enough readers. (Stupid should change their system…)

**Synopsis**: Muraki manages to kidnap Tsuzuki from Meifu from under the nose of Tatsumi and Hisoka. Slowly, through the course of days, Tsuzuki and Muraki begin to learn each other's motivation…

**Stockholm Syndrome**

**Chapter One**

Tsuzuki lay on his bed, thinking. Hisoka was in the other room, he'd just gone to get the two of them a cup of coffee, so they could sit up and talk. They had just made love for the fifth time that week and Tsuzuki really wanted nothing more than to curl into a little ball and sleep.

He was truly tired now. Even though he admitted to himself that he loved Hisoka, the longing to move on was slowly becoming more and more prominent. He was beginning to consider passing on. Would he be allowed?

"Tsuzuki! There's someone at the door, would you go get it?" Hisoka called through. Tsuzuki sighed, dragging himself off the bed and pulling a pair of trousers on. They were just 'mucking around the house' trousers, i.e. ill-fitting jeans that were too tight around the ass and too loose everywhere else, not to mention the fact they were full of holes.

"Tsuzuki! Hurry up and get that! I've got a kettle full of hot coffee here!" Hisoka yelled. Tsuzuki chuckled, standing up and answering the door.

He stared.

"Hello Tsuzuki-san."

xXx

Hisoka heard a slight scuffling sound, then the door banging heavily. He looked at it and blinked. There was no way…

On the floor was a doll with fine auburn curls and a beautiful face. Hisoka picked it up his hands shaking.

"No… Tsuzuki…"

xXx

Tsuzuki awoke in a surprisingly modern looking apartment. He looked around and saw the various beautiful furnishings, the wonderful view of some city out of the window, the overall chic of what could only be described as his prison.

"Do you like it, Tsuzuki-san?" He heard a voice say behind him. It was deep, silky… He turned, suddenly remembering the way he'd passed out on his doorstep. Had Muraki carried him here? The man was physically stronger than he remembered.

"I would like it even more if I were free to leave it," Tsuzuki sulked. He folded his arms from where he was sat on a soft white leather sofa, glaring at Muraki. It only caused the man to laugh, not the evil, creepy laugh that Tsuzuki had heard so many times, but a soft, heart-felt sound that made the shinigami wonder what the hell had happened to the psychotic doctor that he knew and… knew…

"Please, Tsuzuki-san, do not… glare… so… It is a habit best left to Kurosaki-san…" Muraki was still chuckling slightly. Tsuzuki however had picked up on something there… 'Kurosaki-san'? Since when did Muraki ever refer to Hisoka as anything except 'doll' or 'brat'… That was just… weird…

"Tatsumi will find me you know," Tsuzuki threated. Muraki was pouring two glasses of wine. He handed it to Tsuzuki, who decided he knew what to do with it. Eyeing it for a moment he threw it in Muraki's face.

"Let me go… Now," He hissed. Muraki used the sleeve of his white suit to wipe away the wine.

"I hope you are going to volunteer for the dry cleaning, Tsuzuki-san," Muraki replied. Tsuzuki found himself growing frustrated with Muraki's lack of reaction so far. He should be going into an 'baddies monologue' by now, but instead he was neatly avoiding the topic that he had kidnapped Tsuzuki and that there would be consequences.

"How did you kidnap me anyhow? I thought that only the dead and the invited could get into Meifu?" Tsuzuki asked. At this, Muraki did look as though he was going to respond. He removed his wine soaked suit jacket, placing it on the floor away from the puddle of wine rapidly soaking into the cream carpet.

"I hitched a ride. Came in through a back door. You know, everywhere has them, this apartment block, computer programs, Tokyo Tower, even Meifu. You just have to know where to look," Muraki explained and began to unbutton his shirt. Tsuzuki watched, transfixed as the doctor's slender fingers undid each button. What was it that was so… so…

Hisoka.

There, that ruined any weird thoughts.

Think of Hisoka. He'll be worried about you.

And Tatsumi.

And Watari…

And 003…

"What the hell are you doing?" Tsuzuki asked, standing up and backing away. Muraki blinked, then let his trousers drop to the floor.

"You soaked me with wine, Tsuzuki-san. I did not intend on spending the night here tonight, therefore, have only my boxers that are clean. The other clothes are yours. I guessed your size at the store. If I make you uncomfortable, why not have a look around? After all, you'll be spending quite some time here," Muraki suggested. Tsuzuki growled low in his throat but was soon departing the room anyway. Something about Muraki sprawled out on the sofa, reading a book, looking so Hisoka-like it was scary, made Tsuzuki uneasy.

There was also something about the way his throat seemed to have tightened in something other than fear.

Excitement.

He shouldn't be feeling that around Muraki. He felt guilty, because he felt like he'd already betrayed Hisoka merely by being in the same room with Muraki. Yet… there was something about this Muraki… Something different… As though he was relaxed… As though he wasn't expecting to be sprung, he wasn't waiting for their time to be up so he could have the final showdown… Like this was the end of Muraki's plans.

But…

Tsuzuki decided to stop thinking, he was confusing himself.

He entered the first room he came to, it was a bathroom. Beautiful white Japanese style bathtub with gold colored taps, a sink in the shape of a shell… And a toilet… Tsuzuki guessed that there was only so much you could do with a toilet…

He then walked into the next room, a study, absent of a phone or internet connection. The walls were lined with books, most Tsuzuki could remember having read when they were first published. He perused the bookcase for a while, realization suddenly dawning on him. All these books, they were his favorites, ones he had had particularly liked, ones he had recommended Hisoka read… Muraki had really done his research…

There was an adjoining door from the study, which opened out into the kitchen. Tsuzuki at first thought it strange to have it like that, but then he realized that the study had probably originally been intended to be a dining room.

"Well, this is a kitchen…" Tsuzuki announced. It wasn't spectacular. It was, as Tsuzuki said, a kitchen.

He ventured back through the study to try the last door. He was greeted by the sight of a large four poster bed, complete with white silk drapes and beautiful cream sheets. Tsuzuki took a few steps inside…

"This is…" He breathed, then fell to his knees.

He could almost see Ruka playing on the rug to the side of the bed, himself beside her, showing her his new toy, a mechanical wind up soldier. Then their mother walked in, laughing at them huddled on the floor of her bedroom, picking up Ruka, snuggling on their bed…

"'Kaasan…" He whispered.

"I could only find this picture from your family records, the rest were destroyed in a mysterious fire. I recreated it from the picture," Muraki explained from the doorway. Tsuzuki turned, staring at Muraki. A tear escaped the corner of his eye, before grief welled up.

"Take it away… Make it go away!" He found himself sinking to his knees.

"I didn't mean to… I didn't mean to! It wasn't my fault!" He sobbed, trying desperately to prevent himself revisiting that night…

"T-Tsuzuki-san?" Muraki asked, his voice soft. It was the slight stutter in Muraki's voice on top of suddenly being confronted with his past that made Tsuzuki break down. Crying out things that he hadn't told Hisoka, Watari or even Tatsumi.

"I killed them… I killed them both… Over there, there was an oil lamp… I-I knocked it over but I was too afraid to tell anyone I'd done it. There was oil all over the place… Ruka… she dropped her candle… I killed them… I killed them…!" Tsuzuki sobbed. Muraki's arms were suddenly encircling his shoulders. He turned, blindly, burying his face in Muraki's shoulders. He forgot who the man was, at the moment, he was comfort.

"Well, if you're going to sleep in here, we'd better make some changes…" Muraki said, standing up and looking around for a moment. He then started to rip off the drapes around the bed, take down pictures, bundle up the rug and dumped them all unceremoniously outside the door.

"Better?" Muraki asked. Tsuzuki blinked. What the hell? Muraki was being nice? Was the world ending? Why was he being so out of character? (At this point in time, Tsuzuki would like to point out that the author has been half-crazed by trying to put 'Muraki' and 'sap' into the same story. Therefore, she had to compensate and make the characters speculate on why everyone was so out of character. Gomen.)

"Y-Yeah… But I still don't want to be in here alone toni-" Tsuzuki just realized what he'd said.

"Does that mean what I think it means, Tsuzuki-san?" Muraki asked, the eyebrow above his normal eye twitching upwards, a slight smile on his face. Not a smirk. A smile.

"N-No! Er, that is, if you were thinking that, er, you know?" Tsuzuki found, to his sheer horror, he was blushing. Why was he acting like a pathetic virgin?

"So articulate…" Muraki drawled. The next thing Tsuzuki knew, he was being laid on the bed, the thick duvet being pulled over him, tucked around him. He looked up into Muraki's eyes to see the flashes of tenderness in them… It strange, to see the lust yet also seeing the tenderness in Muraki's expression. Stranger still, it seemed that there was love in the enlarged 'creepy eye' (as Watari had so scientifically dubbed it) and lust in the normal one.

"This doll will stay with you tonight. It is spelled so it will call me if you get scared… Sort of like a baby monitor I suppose," He said, sitting the doll against Tsuzuki. No sooner had Muraki's hand pulled away had Tsuzuki grabbed it, hugging it to his chest. Muraki blinked, then smiled.

"What's it's name?" The brunet asked softly. Muraki blinked.

"Asuka," He replied. Tsuzuki nodded.

"It's a nice name… Although it reminds me a little too much of that brat-child from Evangelion…" Tsuzuki yawned and pulled the blankets higher.

"I always thought that it would have been a better ending if Ikari Gendo had committed suicide… Or if Kaworu and Shinji had got together…" Muraki said, as though he spent all his time pondering anime pairings. Tsuzuki chuckled, he hadn't taken Muraki for an avid anime fan…

"I didn't understand Evangelion… What was with the whole 'Human Instrumentality' thingy? Was it meant to be a clip show or what?" Tsuzuki asked, sleepily. Muraki shrugged.

"I don't know, I didn't understand it either," The doctor replied.

"Admitting you don't know something, sensei?" Tsuzuki taunted. Muraki didn't reply. Tsuzuki was asleep anyway two minutes later.

xXx

Burning… Burning! Everything was burning!

"Wake up!" He felt something hit his head, snapping it to his right. He opened his eyes and was met by mismatched ones. Without restraint he flew into Muraki's arms, shivering and crying.

"A nightmare?" Muraki asked. Tsuzuki just shuddered.

"T-Touda…" He managed to stutter in reply. Nothing more was said for a while. Then:

"Stay… Stay so I can sleep…" Tsuzuki whispered. Muraki seemed to be torn.

"You understand, Tsuzuki, that though I might be being nice to you, I am still the same man who raped Hisoka. To ask me to stay would give me an invitation," There was strain to Tsuzuki's voice. It was strange. Muraki was warning him? Why?

"I want to do this the right way. I don't want to be like him," Muraki forced out. Tsuzuki didn't know or care who 'he' was. He was just suddenly aware that… Muraki was human too. Perhaps that made his crimes more horrific, but Tsuzuki didn't care. Muraki actually wanted Tsuzuki to fall in love with him. Which meant that Muraki himself had to feel something…

"Stay…" Tsuzuki managed to whisper.

Muraki crawled into bed with Tsuzuki, desperately trying to keep a hold of himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**To:** "Jollyolly"

**From**: "Neko Kate-Chan"

**Author's Notes**: _I think I attracted enough readers to safely M rate this now This chapter is little bits of cuteness with lemon thrown in at the end. Seeing as this is only a four-part fic, I understand that some will think this is rushed, but the bulk of Muraki/Tsuzuki interactions happen in this and the third chapter. The fourth has a plot twist that you're most likely not expecting._

_I'm entering a competition that could let me get my story published, therefore there might be a little bit of neglect to my fanfiction. Don't worry though, even if I get published I'll still keep writing my fanfiction! I have until my birthday (July 15th) to get three chapters done and as of yet I don't have a clue what to write… I'm thinking of using the world of 'The Butterfly' but a different situation…_

**Stockholm Syndrome**

**Chapter Two**

"Tatsumi-san! Tatsumi-san! Tatsumi-sa-!" Hisoka was yelling as he made his way through the office. He barged into Tatsumi's private office, ignoring Watari's whine of protest as he was interrupted from begging for funding again.

"Tatsumi-san! Muraki's got Tsuzuki! He just took him! There was nothing I could do! I couldn't protect him! I couldn't-" Hisoka seemed to be having a nervous breakdown. Tatsumi however, seemed perfectly calm.

"Watari-san, go visit Oriya. Oh, and inform Kanoe-Kachou. I'll make further investigations of my own," Tatsumi instructed, standing up. Hisoka made to follow Watari but was stopped.

"Go home Kurosaki-kun, there is nothing you can do. If you get involved it means we not only have to find Tsuzuki-san, we also have to protect you from Muraki. Please, I am ordering you to wait here in Meifu." His hand was on Hisoka's shoulder, restraining him. The boy looked about to protest, but the steel in Tatsumi's eyes obviously deterred him.

xXx

Tsuzuki woke up feeling confused. The chest against his back was too broad to be Hisoka's, the arms too strong. Then he remembered. He turned, prepared to pull away, but found himself stopping.

He'd never seen Muraki with his defences down before. Although there was the slight scarring around one eye, his skin appeared smooth, flawless. Strands of silky hair had fallen across his face and could not have been better arranged by an artist. The duvet had moved down, exposing a muscled chest, adorned with a few scars. Well, Tsuzuki supposed there were certain occupational hazards in being a psychopath.

For some reason, Tsuzuki couldn't look away. It was at the moment Tsuzuki was wondering what the rest of Muraki looked like that the man woke up. Tsuzuki's eyes were where they should not have been, and his blush clearly gave away his thoughts.

"Ohayo Tsuzuki-san," Muraki's rich voice broke Tsuzuki from his less-than-pure thoughts.

"O-Ohayo Muraki-sensei," he replied, knowing full well that Muraki had caught him staring and feeling strangely… excited by it…

"What time is it?" Muraki asked, then rubbed his eyes, yawning. These human actions seemed so strange when you considered this was Muraki! Psychopaths shouldn't look cute with bed hair!

"Oh, er," Tsuzuki blushed again, turning to look at the alarm clock "It's nine"

"Nine?" Muraki blinked then shot out of bed, throwing on the previous night's clothes, cursing under his breath. It struck the stunned Tsuzuki as exceptionally comical.

"Oh hell, Oriya will go crazy!" Muraki was hissing to himself. Tsuzuki couldn't hold in the silent giggles any longer.

"What's so funny?" Muraki's voice sounded strangely reproachful.

"You sound like Hii-chan," Tsuzuki replied. Muraki winced slightly at the honorific. There was a heavy silence…

"I was very like Hisoka once. I am hoping his fate will be kinder than mine," was all Muraki said as he left a very puzzled Tsuzuki.

xXx

Tsuzuki was a little bored. He'd showered and dressed in the exquisite clothes Muraki had purchased for him, before curling up with Richard Down's 'Watership Down'. It wasn't long, however, before he'd grown bored of the book he'd been re-reading ever since it was published in 1976.

He turned to the TV, flicking absently through the channels. It seemed Muraki had thought of everything. He had paid for cable. More importantly, the Disney Channel.

Tsuzuki settled down for three hours of _Hercules_, _Recess_ and _Timone and Pumbaa_.

He figured he must have fall asleep, because when he awoke, Muraki was softly stroking his face. He surprised himself by smiling at the doctor.

"Konban wa, you've been out cold for hours. I wasn't sure whether or not to wake you," the doctor looked a little sheepish. Muraki was so full of surprises today.

"Oh, I'm a strange sleeper. I have a sleep debt to rival… I dunno, something that doesn't sleep. Comes from spending 72 years of battling nightmares," Tsuzuki explained. Muraki seemed satisfied with this answer as he went back to absently stroking Tsuzuki's hair, glancing over at the TV.

"Tsuzuki-san?"

"Mmmmm?"

"Why are you watching cartoons?"

"I like them!" Tsuzuki protested. "When I was born 'Steamboat Willie' hadn't even been drawn! They're a novelty!" Muraki went quiet. (Note: Steamboat Willie was the first Disney cartoon, which is the first cartoon with Mickey Mouse. It was aired during the wartime.)

"I forget sometimes how old you are… At 99, I must seem like a petulant child…" the white haired man said, a small smile on his face.

"Not really. No, Hisoka radiates childishness, Hijiri does, Tsubaki did, even Watari does to a certain extent. There is something about certain people though that makes age meaningless. People like Tatsumi, who I know is waaaaaaay older than me, but he doesn't seem to have learned anything about emotions yet," Tsuzuki mused. Muraki's hands had stopped their therapeutic ministrations on Tsuzuki's scalp.

"Don't tell me you don't know Tatsumi is in love with you?" Muraki sounded incredulous. Tsuzuki just looked depressed.

"He did once… We were a couple. It didn't work. Tatsumi always gave in, played nice and was selfless… It made me feel like he had no emotions. Eventually we broke our partnership after just three months." He seemed unaware he was arming the shinigami's most threatening enemy with information to plot Tatsumi's downfall…

"He's spending a lot of time with Watari at the moment. I think Watari's liked him for ages but never said anything. Maybe Tatsumi's finally noticed?" Tsuzuki mused.

"Who is this Watari? I don't believe I've met him," Muraki said. Tsuzuki smiled up at him, then cocked his head to one side.

"Well, he's about as tall as me. Blonde hair, blue eyes, funny accent-"

"And a chibi owl?" Muraki finished for him. Tsuzuki nodded, then his eyes narrowed. He pulled away from the doctor, suspicion radiating off him.

"He was with Oriya this morning… I wondered why he just stood up and left when I got there…" Muraki shrugged. The shinigami didn't seem too impressed, but then Tsuzuki began to laugh.

"We're in Kyoto!" he said happily. Muraki blinked and then sighed. He'd given away their location in a stupid comment. He usually was sharper than that… It was Tsuzuki, looking so relaxed, so at home, it had knocked him off guard.

"I am hurt, Tsuzuki-san. You still wish to escape?" Muraki asked. The brunet seemed to ponder this question but he didn't reply. Muraki stood up, walking to the bathroom, letting the door slam behind him.

xXx

"Muraki-san?" Tsuzuki knocked on the door to the bathroom. Muraki had been in there for two hours… Tsuzuki had convinced himself that he wasn't worried, he was just… just… something… That's right…

"Muraki?" he tried again. There was no response. Deciding to take a chance, Tsuzuki opened the door to the bathroom, stopping when he saw Muraki watching him with a smirk on his face.

"So eager to bath with me?" the doctor asked. Tsuzuki swallowed. He couldn't help but run an appreciative eye over Muraki's body, submerged in the water of the bath. It wasn't fair for a man to be so evil yet so beautiful…

"I-I… Um… I'll wait outside…" Tsuzuki said lamely.

"Tsuzuki-san, would you be so kind as to pass me some towels?" Muraki asked, gesturing to the towels that were just too far to be reached from the bath. Tsuzuki nodded, reaching down to grab the towels and moving over to the bathtub. He tried not to look, so he didn't quite expect it when he got pulled in.

Spluttering he shook the water out of his hair and glared at Muraki, who was smiling that 'I'm about to molest you within an inch of your life' look. Water had gushed out of the bath and had coated the bathroom. Luckily, the drain in the centre of the floor was allowing the water out rather than it soaking into the hall carpet. (Note: Japanese bathrooms tend to be 'splash proof' and completely tiled. Drains are common...)

"I hate you," Tsuzuki said with too much conviction. He was surprised that he'd even said it. Muraki just shrugged, lathering up one of those squishy, poofy, netty things that Tsuzuki didn't know the name of and proceeding to wash himself as though it was perfectly normal to have a fully clothed and irate man sharing his bathtub.

Tsuzuki wouldn't put it past Muraki if it was.

Tsuzuki made to get out but then found himself pinned roughly against the side. Muraki was behind him, with one of his arms in a lock, similar to their position in Kyoto… Except this time they were in a bath… And Muraki was naked… And he was pushed far closer to Tsuzuki's own body.

"I knew it was too good to be true…" Tsuzuki sighed. "Eventually I knew that the molest-fest would begin…" He knew he'd caught Muraki with that statement. The man would be torn between just molesting Tsuzuki now or trying to win him over with sweetness. They remained like that for a while, the water cooling on their skin, Tsuzuki started to shiver, his wet shirt clinging to his skin.

"Gomen ne… Tsuzuki-san," Muraki whispered; his hold slackened but he didn't let go. Tsuzuki's knees were starting to hurt against the enamel of the bath. "Gomen ne… For everything… Nagasaki… the Queen Camilla, Kyoto… For Hisoka… And for this… I have been selfish…"

It took Tsuzuki completely off guard. He didn't know what to say. What had changed Muraki so? How could he possibly have changed so much? Or was this just another act? The hold was let go and Muraki got out of the bath, hurriedly wrapping a towel around his waist. Tsuzuki didn't realise what he was doing until he'd clambered out of the bath and tripped over his own feet. He tumbled into Muraki and they hit the floor with a dull thud and wet slap of skin against wet tiles.

"Ooops…" Tsuzuki said, Muraki's eyes looked vaguely dazed as he looked up at Tsuzuki.

"Please be more careful, Tsuzuki-san. Unlike you, if I do split my skull open I will die," Muraki informed him. The situation struck Tsuzuki suddenly as funny. Usually the position was reversed, and he was the one feeling uncomfortable trapped by Muraki but now that it was reversed… There was something comical about it…

"You know, Muraki-sensei, you look almost… cute… when you look like that," Tsuzuki chuckled. Muraki just blinked, his vision finally clearing.

"In fact," Tsuzuki leaned forward, down to Muraki's right ear. It was something everyone had noticed. Muraki always molested to the left side of people… So, Tsuzuki would do the opposite… It seemed fitting… "You look adorable." He said the last word as a sort of purr. He then got off Muraki, padding into the lounge.

He hoped that he'd left Muraki as confused as he felt. He sure as hell didn't know why he'd done that…

xXx

"Do you wish for me to stay tonight, Tsuzuki-san?" Muraki asked. Tsuzuki seemed to think about it, then nodded slowly. The doctor stretched and walked over to the bedroom, slipping beneath the covers and getting comfortable. He felt the bed sag as Tsuzuki got on the other side, the right side. Muraki had never really thought it mattered what side of the bed he slept on, but now he found that Tsuzuki was to his right, he felt slightly vulnerable.

He was left-handed. He hated being at a disadvantage. It was why he always went to people's left he guessed…

He started when he felt Tsuzuki's arms wrap around his waist. He didn't say anything however, Tsuzuki was still awake so that meant a wrong move could spell disaster for his plans to win the man over.

"Muraki?" Tsuzuki said. Muraki turned over to see Tsuzuki was blushing slightly.

"Would you… Would you show me… if it's possible for you to love me?" Tsuzuki asked. Muraki didn't quite understand. He thought that his actions had made it quite clear… Going so far as to literally stalk the shinigami, wasn't that enough?

"I'm not so sure I-"

"I'm giving in to you. I want to see if it's possible for you to… to love me without… without… molesting me… I don't know, I just get the feeling that if I give in then I might get a better idea or something… Argh, I don't know," Tsuzuki buried his now glowing face in a pillow. Muraki just took in what had just been said to him.

"Do you want me to be in love with you?" Muraki asked, carefully. Tsuzuki peeked up from the pillow.

"I don't know… I don't like the weird child molester-" Tsuzuki blinked when Muraki folded his arms like a spoiled child who'd just been told they couldn't have something.

"For your information, I have never molested anyone under the age of thirteen. That's the legal age here. So I was not, in any shape of form, a paedophile. I am disgusted that you would call me one," the pale man said, his hackles rising. Tsuzuki sighed.

"Right, I apologise. I just want to know who you are. Are you the vulnerable person who has had wrongs done to you? Or are you just someone who takes pleasure in other's pain?" Tsuzuki asked. Muraki swallowed, eventually giving up trying to figure out how having sex with someone could tell you anything about that person, and tilted Tsuzuki's face up to his. He was rewarded by being able to look into those large amethyst orbs, dancing with some unknown emotion.

"Are you nervous, Tsuzuki-san?" Muraki asked. Tsuzuki snorted.

"I'm not a pathetic virgin you know," he retorted. Muraki blinked.

"Don't tell me you thought…" Tsuzuki was grinning. "You honestly thought Hisoka was only 'round my apartment making coffee? Or that Tatsumi and I were just partners?"

"I guess I did," Muraki said, then surprised Tsuzuki by running his hands through the man's hair. Tsuzuki's eyes fluttered closed as Muraki continued to stroke the shinigami's hair. Once Muraki was sure Tsuzuki was relaxed he closed the space between them, delighting in the fact that Tsuzuki had neglected to wear pyjamas and that he only had boxers on.

He brushed his lips softly over Tsuzuki's own, being as gentle as he could. There was a beautiful moment where he felt the elation of finally possessing Tsuzuki, before it was quickly shattered. As he pulled back and stared into those defiant violet eyes, he realised that it was idiotic to believe that he could ever 'own' Tsuzuki. The man had too much life in him to ever be a possession, to ever be a doll.

"Is that what you wanted me to realise?" Muraki asked, chuckling softly at Tsuzuki's puzzled frown. He kissed him again, this time allowing himself a little more leeway, pushing his tongue into Tsuzuki's mouth, making love to the shinigami's tongue with his own, his hands roaming over the soft skin of Tsuzuki's muscular back.

"Mmm-mm-mm!" Tsuzuki tried to speak but Muraki's tongue in his mouth prevented anything but muffled squeaks from getting past his vocal chords. Muraki pulled back, feeling a little irritated that Tsuzuki was interrupting something he'd been waiting forever for.

"Mark me… like you did Hisoka… Well, not exactly like you did Hisoka, because then I'd be dead and everything but… You get what I mean, right?" Tsuzuki asked. Muraki blinked, then nodded. He looked at the soft, perfect skin of Tsuzuki's torso and paled. To damage his skin… His own words came back to haunt him.

"_Dolls can be repaired if broken. This is why they are superior to humans."_

"If… that is truly what you wish…" Muraki whispered. He started to kiss Tsuzuki again, reaching under his pillow to bring out a knife. He always slept with it there… Oriya hadn't approved but… Ever since Saki… He'd never felt safe without a weapon close by…

"I love you, Tsuzuki-san," he whispered, before slipping Tsuzuki's boxers off the man's hips. He straddled the man, his eyes roaming the beautiful form below him. Muraki raised a shaking hand, placing the tip of the knife on Tsuzuki's collarbone. He pressed down lightly, it was making an indent in Tsuzuki's skin but it hadn't broken it. Muraki felt self-hatred well within him and he dropped the knife.

"Gomen ne…" he whispered, pulling away. He turned his back on Tsuzuki, feeling ashamed.

"What happened to you?" Tsuzuki asked. Muraki stared at the wall.

"I tried to bring Saki back from the dead with a spell and… instead… it showed me how my crimes compared to his… I am so much worse than him…" the doctor replied. He felt Tsuzuki wrap arms around his waist, holding him against the other man tightly.

"Do you feel regret?" Tsuzuki asked. Muraki pondered this question.

"For some, not for others. It is hard to describe… Heh… I guess you'd have to be as crazy as me to understand why I can justify what I did to Eileen but can't justify what I did to Hisoka… Did you know that Eileen was still alive when I removed her heart? I just threw her overboard without a thought…" he replied. Tsuzuki's heart was hammering, Muraki could feel it against his back. Was he scaring the other man?

"I don't understand and perhaps that can only be a good thing. I do know that it is a great burden to bear though, guilt…" Tsuzuki breathed. Muraki turned around in Tsuzuki's arms, staring into those violet orbs.

He then moved forward, kissing Tsuzuki gently at first, but quickly losing his control. He grabbed a fistful of Tsuzuki's hair, pulling the man's head back to gain access to the soft skin of his neck. The shinigami let out a breathy moan.

"S-Sensei…" Tsuzuki breathed when Muraki's mouth moved down across his torso, tongue swirling around a nipple. Muraki had no idea why Tsuzuki had started to call him that, but he wasn't necessarily going to stop him… It definitely had a nice ring to it when said like that…

Muraki trailed his hands down Tsuzuki's sides, before moving his mouth lower, leaving a trail of kisses until he reached the base of Tsuzuki's penis. He smirked, licking along Tsuzuki's length. The man bucked his hips slightly and looked down with heated eyes. Muraki got the message.

He slowly took Tsuzuki into his mouth, relaxing his throat to allow him past the gag reflex. The shinigami buried his hands in the platinum blonde of Muraki's hair, urging him to move faster. Muraki obliged, swirling his tongue along the underneath, eager to finally taste Tsuzuki.

"Nnn… N-No…" Tsuzuki breathed, although he still pushed his hips forward into Muraki's mouth. Muraki continued until he could taste the bitter, thick substance coating his mouth. He eagerly swallowed it all, savouring the taste like wine. When he looked up however…

"Tsuzuki?" he said, disbelievingly.

"Mmm?" the man asked.

"You aren't going to sleep are you?"

"Tsuzuki?"

"Tsuzuki?"

"…"

xXx

**End Notes:**_ Sorry about the end. I couldn't help but have Tsuzuki fall asleep. I'm suffering from sex scene overload. I've written one for 'The Butterfly' and then I'm writing 'At Your Service' too (which is one long sex scene…) So I'm just… lemoned out…_

_Expect more soon _


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